"Eden's Return" is coming slowly, but I'm determined to finish it this month. I can't have another incomplete story after abandoning "Castle LaMagie" and "The Wyvern Riders." In fact, when I'm done,  the next job is to finish those two stories as well.

Now that I'm 35K words into the story, I'm realizing I need certain characters to make the story work. Fortunately, I have a squad of 12 soldiers, so I can just adapt a couple of them to the necessary plot points.

Even when I don't do much writing on my walks, I'm figuring out the plot. I think I have a satisfactory ending now.  Maybe a little too on point, but there it is. If you're going to write about Eden, you probably can't be too subtle. 

I can't seem to suss all this out in advance. Fortunately, this time a least, it's just a matter of insertions to get the job done, instead of rearranging. I've had to completely rewrite the beginnings of both "Shadows Over Summer House" and "Fateplay." It actually was all right in the end, but I'd prefer not to have to do that.

So at least half of the quality of "Eden's Return" is going to have to come from the rewrite. This percentage seems to be varying for each book, anywhere from getting 50% right to 90% right.

I'm going to muddle through on these three stories, but the next time I start a new story, it's back to the old process which worked so well. I experimented with a slower pace and it didn't work.

Busybody that I am.

Sometimes it seems to me that I can see clearly what others should do, in both writing and in storefronts.

I can walk into a store and figure out a dozen ways to improve it instantly, without a huge amount of investment, just by reorganizing.

I can read a story and instantly figure out a dozen ways to clean it up, sharpen it, and make it much better.

Or so I tell myself. (I hereby formally recognize the caveat that I might be wrong.)  

Can I do anything about it? Hell, no. In fact, I have to be careful not to say much at all. People don't appreciate it. Either I couch it in such a diplomatic way that they pay no attention, or I try hard to convince them, which repels them.

Even in writer's group, which is more or less set up for this purpose, I have to be very careful and selective with what I say, and with the knowledge that they probably won't take my advice anyway.

So here's the thing: what if there are people out there who can do the same thing for me--both in my writing and my storefront? How would I accept it or reject it?

I think I have a rare turn of mind, frankly. Analyzing constantly. Cutting to the quick. So the truth is there probably aren't that many people who can do it. And those who can, are constrained by the same problems of diplomacy as I am. But most of all--everyone is busy with their own stuff, you know? Including me--so that if anyone actually did take me up on my offer, I'd probably find myself over my head rather quickly.

It drives me nuts sometimes. Especially in bookstores. "Just do this," I want to say. "Try it!" I want to go in and start cleaning and organizing and straightening. I want to pull books from the back and highlight them, and take other books and file them differently.

In writing, I want to take a red pen and slash and burn.

Last week at writer's group, I took one paragraph of a story and had my way with it. The story itself is very interesting and fun but the writer is a little addicted to modifiers and adverbs, so I went through that one long paragraph and cut them all, then read the result to her.

To me, the whole paragraph was vastly improved. She nodded her head as if she understood, but I never know whether they actually change things.

Obviously, it's much, much harder to see my own failings, in both business and in writing. I don't know what I don't know.

It's just that there are things I know, and I can see how some of those things could help others, and I have to just watch as they--in my opinion--do it wrong. 


Give me my SF and Fantasy straight, man. Don't dilute it.

I want to like Doctor Who, really I do. I want to like Terry Pratchett, really I do. I want to like Douglas Adams, really I do.

It would make things so much easier.

The humor escapes me. I mean, I love the bon mots of Buffy and Firefly, the Marvel movies, and so on.

But when it comes to straight SF or Fantasy the quirkiness pulls me right out of the story.

Linda and I watched the first episode of the new Doctor Who. I noticed that Linda was chuckling throughout the show but it got nary a chuckle out of me. It seems very light, not much to invest in. I mean, I've seen snippets of Doctor Who, such as the Van Gogh story, that were powerful, but when I watch the show itself I'm just sort of not interested.

Linda has shows she watches, and I have shows I watch, and I have shows that she watches with me, and she has shows I watch with her, and then there are shows that we both love.

Lodge 49 was a show that Linda watched because I was watching it. But by the end, she was fully into it.

"How can you not be?" I said. "It's kind and gentle and down-to-earth, just like you are."

I mean, talk about quirky--but I loved it.

So I can't explain my resistance to humorous SF and Fantasy. I 'm not altogether consistent--I loved Good Omens, for instance, which is Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. But mostly, I'm turned off by it.

Give me my SF and Fantasy straight, man. Don't dilute it. 

The overall story mystique of "Eden's Return" has me in its grips. But the story itself--I'm struggling. Oh, I could write it. I have the basic framework in mind, but it wouldn't be remarkable in any way. It would be predictable and pedestrian.

The idea deserves better than that.

I'm trying to coax the inspiration out. I'll spend a couple of hours each day just hoping that a single thread of original thought will come to me. I've spent several days with nothing coming. I'm hoping for something a little more.

I basically have two story threads--one is reality based, a struggle for survival, the crew being picked off one by one. I mean, the reader would know by now that that is happening, so the only suspense is how exactly they get picked off and who, if anyone, is going to survive.

Even that, I'd like to bring something surprising to, but that may not be possible. This is more a matter of crafting the action, making it interesting and evocative.

The other storyline is more mystical and strange--and that's the part I want to fly. So far, I've had an "imaginary" friend, who is a manifestation of the Refuge, or Mother Nature, or whatever force created the Stasis.

So that was satisfying, and I'll be able to bring Artemis back when I want to.

The second mystical thing to happen is that Shani astro-projects, sees what is happening to the soldiers. That was also satisfying.

So far I don't think I've missed anything, but it is coming slowly, and I want to continue to have that feeling that I haven't missed anything. The moment I'm not satisfied is the moment I stop and try to coax out something different.

I haven't always done this. I've continued to write stories at a certain pace, and sometimes plot lines develop that I'm not completely satisfied with, but which fits the needs of the story and so I've gone with them.

I'm not going to do that anymore. Each choice needs to be one I feel comfortable with.

It is taking a lot longer--waiting for inspiration--but I have the time. I've written so many stories by now that I no longer fear being stuck. Something will happen, and I'll wait for it to happen.

More luck than planning.

I like the plot of "Eden's Return"--such as it is. It's very simple. More thematic in structure than twisty.

The simple is hard.

I have two viewpoint characters and I'm alternating chapters between them. My guess is that part one will come in at about 50K words. If there is a satisfying climax, that may be the whole book, allowing for a second book. If not, I'll need to continue and just make it a longer book.

50K means that it will end up around 60K because my rewrites always add about 15% to the total. 60K is more like the length of the books I wrote when I started out. When I thought I might be writing for the mainstream, I pushed myself into the +80K territory, and ended up with several books +100K, culminating in "Fateplay" which was 120K. 

It's been slow going, which is fine as long as I can keep my focus. My focus comes from really feeling like I've got the right action. So I've been inching my way, making sure I feel good about where each scene is going.

The writing is kind of clunky. This isn't one of those books where the first draft is close. But I've become resigned to the process of rewriting, of doing thorough second drafts. I think I'm even starting to like it, kinda, slightly, at least the results.

I'm purposely slowing down from the pell-mell pace I was going at for several years.

It's weird how I constantly feel like I'm just learning enough that maybe this time I can write that book that will have everything. Because that's what it takes. Everything you have, all the brains and emotions and experience you have.

The luck factor even in creation is much bigger than I'd have ever thought. That is, you need a good premise but you can't always tell what a good premise is until you write it, and then the process needs to work out, where you can really focus, then the plot has to go in the right direction, which doesn't always happen, and then you need a couple of characters to take over the book, and a surprise twist that you yourself didn't see coming, and then...well, like I said, everything has to come together and that seems more like luck than planning.

One thing is for sure--I need to have a fictional dream in my life or it feels empty, so not writing is simply not an option.

This has been slow going with "Eden's Return." I feel like there is a real book here, and that I haven't taken any missteps, but to go forward I need a couple of dramatic turn of events.

First of all, I need for Shani to manifest some of her powers. How, what, and why? I also need to continue to explore her spiritual side.

Secondly, I'm pretty relentlessly killing off the squad, one by one, and the reader by now must know that is happening. So how do I keep that fresh?

So those are the two problems. Normally, if I tease at these kinds of problems for awhile, the answers come to me. But not this time. I think maybe because I want the solutions to really elevate the book. I could easily come up with something, but I don't want to settle for anything but that "Wow" feeling I get when I think an idea is special.

So I'm going to continue to worry it, tease it, twist it and ponder it, and hopefully, the right turn of events will pop into my mind, full-blown and magnificent. Heh.

Metaphors need not apply.

One of the frustrations of my earlier writing efforts was people warning me away from genre mixing. I couldn't see any reason why romance and fantasy didn't go together for instance. If only I'd listened to my own instincts.

The other frustration was my efforts at SF and Fantasy were almost always knocked down because I didn't explain everything.

The current story, which is called "Eden's Return" has a lot of logistical things I'm not trying to explain, events that don't necessarily have a neat solution. (As you might guess from the title, there is a lot of symbolism going on.)

I've created a scenario where a bubble has formed over the Pacific Northwest and all the humans have been kicked out and nothing man-made can cross. It is pure nature inside, without mankind's interference.

I'm not explaining the how and the why of it.

There is a current member of my writer's group who is very concrete minded. She keeps asking, "Where are they? What are they doing? Why this? Why that?"

Metaphors need not apply.

I'm going forward. I know the story needs to have internal consistency, but that doesn't mean everything has to be nailed down. To me the story makes an intuitive sense and by the end, I'm sure I'll know more and can go back and maybe do a little explaining.

But dammit, if I want to put in a few anachronisms, I will.

 Go with the flow...or don't.

Going Full Tolkien.

Strangely, I don't read much fantasy these days, even though it is my first love, my first impulse. I find myself dissatisfied with most fantasy, and this has been true since I read LOTR's at 13 years of age. Of course, back then, there was very little of what we now call fantasy, and what came out was pretty bad at first. There have been some modern fantasy writer's who do it pretty well; Martin, Rothfuss, Bujold.

But most mess the mark.

I started reading a well regarded fantasy trilogy last night, and immediately had that familiar feeling of disappointment. On reflection I think it's because the world just isn't fleshed out. It just feels too arbitrary.

This is what has kept me from writing fantasy. I don't like world building (except by writing) and yet I feel it is utterly necessary for the full experience.

Another reason is that I've always been afraid of being too derivative if I indulge in my impulse--there have certainly been plenty of fantasy that I think has shamelessly copied Tolkien.

Tellingly, I haven't even attempted to write heroic fantasy in this second go-around.

But I've been working up to it. Someday I'm going to go full Tolkien, just indulge in the deep nostalgia I have for that period in my life. In a way, all the writing I've done up to now has been leading me to this.

I'm not as worried about being derivative because I've learned that I tend to put my own spin on things no matter what.

The important thing is to tap into that life-changing feeling I had with LOTR's. Here I am, a bookstore owner and fiction writer and life-long nerd. I may have been that way anyway, but LOTR's sealed my doom.

It's like--I'll know when I'm ready, and when I'm ready I'll go all in.

I always like my stories when I'm writing them. When I'm in the throes of a fictional dream, I can convince myself that what I'm writing is special. I suppose that's why I keep writing.

It's only before and after writing the story that I have doubts.

Before, I doubt the premise; I wonder if it's commercial, whether anyone will want to read it; or whether it is a strong enough idea to continue to the end. Does it have enough weight and is it also entertaining?

Usually, after puzzling about these things, I just forget it and do what I wanted to do in the first place, and sure enough, sometimes when I'm finished I realize it's a little too quirky. Occasionally it doesn't have enough heft for me to even finish (though this is rare; like I said, I like the stories when I'm writing them).

And then after I'm finished, the real doubts start. I start to see the flaws, the missteps. Some I can fix, some I can't. They rarely come out perfectly the way I wanted them. (Strangely, it's the middle book in my Vampire Trilogy, "Rule of Vampire," that I remember that way.)

Between books I'm reading other authors, and I always feel like I suffer in comparison. (Never compare?)

But while I'm writing, I'm thoroughly enjoying myself. It is very much like reading a book, finding out where it goes, being surprised, being pleased by what happens.

So in the end, it probably doesn't matter what happens commercially.

The truth is, I need to write for my own well-being. It's good for me; intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. 


Bookstores in Bend.

I've now met and talked to the owners of all the indie bookstores in Bend.

They are all good people and they all have excellent stores.

Roundabout Books in Northwest Crossing has a great selection and wonderful store layout, and she does signings and all that and has some stuff to drink and eat.

Big Story on the corner of 3rd and Greenwood is a fabulous store, very cool, with a really good selection of new and used books.

The Open Book, across the way on Greenwood, has always been a deep and knowledgeable place, and I thought so even when we owned the Bookmark just across the street from them.

Dudley's has a very cool atmosphere with a nice curated selection of new and used books, and of course, lots a space to sit and soak it all up and have some drinks and food while you're there.

Bend is really lucky to have all these stores--and I'm lucky they are all nice people.

They all are unique and individual and own by locals and deserve all the support we can give them.

I've been given free Audible copies of "Led to the Slaughter," which I'd like to give away to any  of you who want it.

https://www.audible.com/pd/Led-to-the-Slaughter-The-Donner-Party-Werewolves-Audiobook/B07DFRLV2M

If you've ever wondered what my writing is about, here's your chance to do it in the most painless way possible.

I'm hoping you'll do a review. Now by review I just mean a short statement, "I really liked it. Neat, cool...(whatever)." Long reviews are not necessary.

If you would like a copy, just email me at sagewind@bendbroadband.com and I'll send you the code and instructions.

You'd be doing me a favor.


"Fateplay" is finished.

"Fateplay" is a bit more ambitious a book than usual for me. It's long, 120,000 words, and science fiction, more or less, and has been worked on longer, beta read and edited, and rethought more than most of my books.

I like it, but I also have those nagging doubts I always have.

I really have done my best on this. Didn't stop working on it until I thought I'd worked out all the kinks I was aware of. Took the extra time, which is the one element I can think to give that can improve my writing and my stories.

It was originally inspired by "Ready, Player, One" but quickly went in a different direction. It's first person and a lot will depend on the Zach, the narrator. If my author's voice doesn't work with this character, if the reader doesn't identify with him, the whole book will fall apart.

Early on, the original protagonist was nowhere near as sympathetic, and I'm glad I made the effort to completely rewrite the origins.

I like the big "twist" at the end, and how I was able to go backward and incorporate the elements of that twist earlier in the book.

I like all the characters.

So...we'll see, I guess. As I said, all I can do is my best.

The Bigger the Ego.

Took me most of the day to get half the edits into the main manuscript of "Fateplay." Will do the other half today. About 20 pages per hour, or roughly 17 hours total, with some breaks in-between.

But once it's done, it's done. I'm not sure if this is my longest book at 119K words. If not, it's close.

I'm catching little continuity errors that no one else saw--probably because I recognize what are vestigial remnants of the first draft.

It's funny. I've been working on cutting down on commas as much as possible, which I think is the modern style. I guess I've succeeded because Lara added a bunch back in. 

This story isn't exactly believable, but I'm hoping it's fun. It's amazing how much character interaction and dialogue I do these days. Looking back on "Star Axe," my first book, I avoided both of those things as much as possible. Spent a lot of time doing action or describing scenery.

Then I finish for the day and sit down to read Michael Moorcock's "Gloriana" and think, wow, that's some great writing.

Then again, the story is kind of dry. I have an appetite for the ironic, slightly detached stuff--like Jack Vance or Michael Swanwick or Norman Spinrad or Michael Moorcock. But they aren't anything like my simple little stories. 

As always, I wish that I could operate on a slightly higher plane; deeper, smarter, more skilled, more emotionally accessible. Like if there was some kind of magic pill I could take. So close, I sometimes feel. I get flashes of that, a really good description or bit of dialogue or emotionally resonant scene. But continuing that kind of inspiration all the way through a book is probably impossible.

My stories are valid, I think. Hopefully entertaining. And every time I start a new book I have a chance to get it completely right.

That said, I think I'm lacking the massive ego of some writers--and I've noticed those massive egos actually seem to sway people. Which is kind of irritating. The same kind of thing you run into everywhere else. In running a store, you can have a big ego and fail miserably, or a small ego and succeed, because it ain't about the ego. I was able to prove it by doing it.

(Advice from a high school friend--if you take yourself seriously, others will take you seriously. Ugh.)

In writing, the bigger the ego, the more narcissistic you are, the more notice you get. Some writers can back it up, but most can't. Sigh.

Who's going to read this?

I got back the edits to "Fateplay" from Lara Milton, my personal editor. She does a very thorough job. I've been lucky from the start that she's willing to do my books.

Normally, I'd just accept her edits, then add whatever changes I've made, but this time I've made so many changes that I'll have to add her edits one by one to my version. Which is going to be a long process--probably take at least one full day, maybe two.

When I'm done with that, I'm pretty much done. There was a bit more editing I'd hoped Lara could do, but she's out of town for a few weeks, so I'll just have to do the best I can on my own.

I'm pretty good, actually. I don't make all that many mistakes, but then...typos are almost impossible to avoid.

So...I'll have another book done.

I feel like I'm slowing down, and then I realize that I've written a couple of books that are only now finished and ready to go, and the "slow down" is obviously relative.

I'm 15K words into "New Brave World," but I'm purposely not pushing it.

Frankly, I think I've worn out my faithful readers who are simply not responding to my new stuff. I hope the publishers will stick with me. They are supporting me by doing covers and editing, and I'm hoping my sales are enough to reward them.

I've made writing central to my life and I don't think that is going to change. There isn't really all that much I want to change--the constant tinkering with process is the big thing.

And, though I always go off in whatever direction appeals to me at the time, maybe I should be doing a little more thinking in advance.

I've never been strategic in my writing choices--it's always been "write what I want to write when I want to write it." Hard to argue with that.

Though sometimes I finish a book and realize it is probably so quirky that "who's going to read this?"

I don't think anyone can out think the market. You just have to hope that whatever you write is appealing. 

No one could have seen it coming?

An anniversary article in the Bulletin about the Great Recession, basically saying that no one could have seen it coming.

By the time they are talking about, circa late 2007, I'd been writing my bubble blog for almost a year. And I was probably late to the party-pooper party. It was pretty clear for years that we were in a housing bubble, especially in Bend.

Not that anyone in the real estate business was listening--except Brooks Resources. They seemed to react very quickly and effectively. But there were plenty of people shouting out warnings.

Not your chicken little types either. For instance, I've not seen what I consider to be a bubble in the stock market or housing market or the economy as a whole since. (Except for bitcoin.) Overvalued is not the same thing as a bubble.

I prepared for the crash, eliminating all debt, making sure I wasn't committed for future product, and cutting expenses--and came through it pretty well. (As well as anyone can do when sales drop by half over a three year period. Heh.)

See, by that time, I'd seen at least five major crashes in the stuff I sell; where stuff that nobody had heard of the day before became something that everyone wanted now and by the time I got a full stock in no one wanted anymore.  Sports cards, comics, beanie babies, pogs, and Pokemon, to mention a few.

Housing showed all the the same signs. The arc is usually the same if you're watching for it. The first crash put me in debt for a decade, the second crash added a few years to that debt, and the third fad we made good money at, and the fourth we made better money at, and the fifth was lucrative too.

And crashes are a good way to get healthy, in a sense. You get down to priorities, figure out what really matters, and what you really want to do. As long as you budget correctly, small drops can be very profitable, and big drops don't have to be destructive.

Most people get that one big bubble in their lifetime and they learn from that. Then, of course, it never happens again. Heh.

I was lucky in a way that I'd been through several bubbles before, even if they were for things like pogs, because I'd already learned my lesson.

But I still feel the need to call out the fallacy that no one saw the Great Recession coming. There were dozens of us talking about it in Bend alone on blogs. But when you're in a bubble, it's hard to see outside of it until it's too late.

I've been stuck for a few days with New Brave World.

I'm writing this blog to try to sort through the problem. You don't mind, do you?

I sort of know where I want it to go, but I'm not sure how to get there--or more to the point, how to get there in an interesting way. I have a squad of soldiers in an isolated place and I need to kill them off one by one, until only the main male protagonist is left, naked and near death, so the main female protagonist can save him.

But once I start down the road of killing them off, it will become pretty obvious to the reader that's what I'm doing.

I asked Linda and she said to make sure I flesh out all the victims first, so that their deaths mean something, which is good advice.

The second possibility is having something else going on at the same time which adds to the mystery. But that may be something that occurs to me later.

I think what I'm going to do is something I've never really done before.

I'm currently 44 pages in. I think I'll go back and add at least a paragraph to each character as they are introduced to delineate their characters. This is something I never do; it falls into the problem of telling, not showing. But showing is a very long and delicate process, and with telling you get that information out there right away. In truth, I've begun to notice that lots of writers do it and that it doesn't really bother me as long as it is subtle.

I'm willing to try new things, and this will be a bit of an experiment. If the descriptions don't work, or slow down the story, I can always go back later and cut them down.

Coming soon to a computer screen near you!
This is my Gothic Noir novel.

Started off as a straight ahead hard-boiled heist book, then as the big Victorian house became a character and a love story ensued, it become a Gothic love story.

It was fun to write.  I'm continuing to explore new genres.

Crossroad Press has been working on the cover for a few days. They had a great Gothic looking house, but the book is pretty specific about it being a Victorian, so we searched for a few days for a good candidate. The final picture is perfect. Even it being at an angle is helpful, because the towers in the house are on different corners and this picture makes it look like it could be any corner.

This was in the middle of my trying to write straight-ahead thrillers, which I enjoyed, but I feel like a little supernatural or SF always spices up a story, so I don't know if I'll stray from that again. In fact, I've been writing science-fiction over the last two books, which I never thought I'd do.

I do hope I still have some readers who will give this a try. May not seem like it, but it's been awhile since I put out a new book.

Wrote a couple of new scenes for "Fateplay."

Even though I'd hoped I was done. Even though I've had it edited.

One was a scene I'd already envisioned, but I'd just run out of energy in the rewrite before I could get it out. So when I got back some beta-read suggestions, I took that opportunity to write out the scene.

The second scene I hadn't thought of before, but became obvious after the beta reader suggested it.

You don't know what you don't know. It's very much like what the editor made me change in "Snaked." He pointed out that I'd pretty much dropped the snakes in the second half of the book. It was very clear once it was pointed out, and it was a problem that could be corrected.

Usually, a corrected problem is an opportunity to correct other problems.

So I had a couple of loose ends that I tied up in a new scene.

The only problem I have is that I'm worried that I'm packing in too many things at the same time--if that is possible.  But well, at least everything is addressed.

Been a little stuck over the last week on "New Brave World."

I think I was putting too high expectations on the story. I don't seem to have the same sort of urge I've had over the last 6 years or so to write every day. I could see myself stalling on this, which after stalling on "Castle LaMagie" and "The Wyvern Riders" would be a worrisome trend.

So this morning I told myself to cut to the chase--write the story straightforwardly without any embellishments, don't worry about length or depth, just get it done.

That seemed to free me up. I have a plot of sorts in mind, but was trying to figure out how to get there. Well, I get there by getting there. Just do it.


Crossroad Press has come up with a cover for "Shadows Over Summer House." The house doesn't much resemble the house in the book, and it probably accentuates the horror more than the Noir, whereas I think the story is more Noir than horror, but I'm not sure I'm in a position to be demanding. I did send a picture of a truly Victorian house, but I'm fine with the cover the way it is.


As soon as I'm done with "New Brave World" I'm going to finish off my "Lander" series once and for all.

Faerylander and Zombielander are done, but I'll need to read them one more time. And I then need to adjust Wolflander and Ghostlander to the changes in the first two books. It really shouldn't take more than a month or so.

One month = 4 books. I need to get on that.

Same with my "Tales of the Thirteen Principalities." Almost done. In this case, more like two weeks = 4 novellas. Stupid of me not to do that.

Than, hopefully before the year is out, get a good start on the next Virginia Reed story.


For the rest of September, it's writing "New Brave World" and seeing what the editor and beta readers have to say about "Fateplay" around mid-month. I'm going to send that story off soon after.