Time and passing.

I've really messed up my last four visits to my sister's, over the last 10 days or so. For which I could kick myself. I managed to arrive her house when she was already so tired from the day that she couldn't respond, or when other necessary nursing things were happening.

But the speed of her decline really caught me off guard. I knew that I would soon need to up my visits from every two days to every day, but a couple of other things got in the way, and I was surprised by what happened.

It probably shouldn't have surprised me. A month ago, she was talking about going on long trips to visit old friends, and she was still taking chemotherapy.

Then a couple of weeks back, I turned to my wife as we drove away, and said, "She's letting go."

Now they've moved her to a hospice bed in the living room.

We visited last night, and it really hit me. The room was full of people talking and laughing in the background, but it was like I had a sadness cocoon around me as I sat in the chair by her bed.

Like our Mom before her, her many friends and her family are rallying. It's nice that my siblings have done well enough in life that they can come and do this.

Her kids, Mattie and Sam, are here, and Ernie has been a rock.

Tina (Pool) McGeary has been calm and cheerful through it all. It just not fair that a spirit and personality as large and kind and generous and funny as hers doesn't have another 20 years to enlarge and fill the people around her. I'm going to miss her.